Talking to Your Teen About Anxiety

Feeling anxious is a common and natural response to stress that everyone experiences from time to time. However, for teens, anxiety can become overwhelming and interfere with their daily lives.

Adolescence is a time of major changes — physically, emotionally, and socially. School pressures, friendships, social media, and family expectations can all contribute to feelings of anxiety. At least 15% of children ages 12-17 suffer from anxiety.

At Keven Tagdiri, M.D. in Encinitas, California, we understand how worrying it can be for parents when their children develop anxiety, and we’re here to help.

Why talking about anxiety matters

As a parent or guardian, having open, supportive conversations about anxiety can make a huge difference in your teen’s well-being. Talking about it helps reduce stigma, encourages healthy coping strategies, and lets your teen know they’re not alone.

Many teens feel isolated in their struggles or may not understand why they feel anxious. Talking openly about anxiety helps to:

Before starting a conversation, it helps to recognize the signs of anxiety.

Recognizing signs of anxiety in teens

While every teen is different, common signs of excessive anxiety include:

If you notice these signs, it might be time to start a conversation about how they’re feeling.

How to talk with your teen about anxiety

Bringing up anxiety with your teen might feel tricky, especially if they’re reluctant to talk. Here are some tips for opening the conversation:

Choose the right time and place

Pick a calm and private setting where your teen feels comfortable. Avoid talking about anxiety when they’re already stressed or upset.

Use open-ended questions

Instead of asking, “Are you feeling anxious?” try: “I’ve noticed you seem worried lately. Do you want to talk about it?” Encourage them to share without making them feel pressured.

Listen without judgment

Let your teen talk without interrupting, and don’t minimize their feelings. Avoid saying things like, “It’s not a big deal” or “Just stop worrying.” Instead, validate their emotions with phrases like, “That sounds really tough” or “I’m here for you.”

Share your own experiences

If appropriate, talk about times you’ve felt anxious and how you coped. That helps your teen see that anxiety is normal and manageable.

Offer support, not solutions

It’s natural to want to fix your child’s problems. In some cases, you can offer practical solutions to resolve the source of their worry. But often, they just need someone to listen. Ask, “How can I support you?” instead of immediately jumping in with solutions.

Teaching healthy coping strategies

Once your teen is open to talking, help them explore coping strategies to manage their anxiety. Some effective methods include:

Deep breathing exercises

Teach your teen simple breathing techniques, such as inhaling for four seconds, holding for four seconds, and exhaling for four seconds.

Physical activity

Encourage activities like walking, running, yoga, or dancing to release stress.

Mindfulness and meditation

Apps like Headspace or Calm can guide them through relaxation exercises.

Journaling

Writing down their thoughts and feelings can help your teen process anxiety.

Limiting screen time

Social media can often increase anxiety. The U.S. Surgeon General’s 2023 advisory found substantial evidence that reducing social media access in teens significantly improves self-reported happiness and life satisfaction while reducing depression and anxiety.

Creating a routine

Having a structured daily schedule can reduce uncertainty and stress.

When to seek professional help for anxiety

If your teen’s anxiety doesn’t improve or becomes overwhelming, consider professional support. Talk to us if:

Our mental health professionals can provide tools to help them manage anxiety effectively.

Talking to your teen about anxiety can open the door to better understanding and emotional support. Being patient, listening without judgment, and encouraging healthy coping skills can ensure your teen feels less alone in their struggles.

With your guidance and support, your teen can learn to manage anxiety and build resilience for the future. For expert help, call us or request an appointment online today.

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